The UFC on Fuel 2 card is starting to firm up, and in order to go off, the promotion will come inside Sweden’s scrotum-looking Ericsson Globe Arena on April 14. Sweden has a metric buttfuckton of MMA fans, and hopefully lots of Swedish MMA fans (*cough* titties *cough* blond hair and asses *cough*) will show up for the show, making the broadcast enjoyable to watch. It seems like the UFC put in a concerted effort to force us into berets and Fiats by booking European fighters in nearly every match:

  • Light heavyweight: Alexander Gustafsson vs. Antonio Rogerio Nogueira
  • Middleweight: Brian Stann vs. Alessio Sakara
  • Welterweight: Paulo Thiago vs. Siyar Bahadurzada
  • Featherweight: Ross Pearson vs. Dennis Siver
  • Welterweight: DaMarques Johnson vs. John Maguire
  • Bantamweight: Brad Pickett vs. Damacio Page
  • Featherweight: Akira Corassani vs. Jason Young
  • Middleweight: Magnus Cedenblad vs. Francis Carmont
  • Welterweight: Papy Abedi vs. James Head
  • Welterweight: Besam Yousef vs. Simeon Thoresen
  • Light heavyweight: Jorgen Kruth vs. Cyrille Diabate

Notable is the triumphant return of Hamid “Akira” Corassani from a lower extremity injury to face Jason Young. I was so captivated by the charismatic portrayal of his kind, humble personality on TUF 14 that I lost sight of how obvious it is that he is a native son of the land of the Volvos. Now that I think about it, his fair skin, blond hair, and blue eyes give away his Swedishness completely.

Apparently, the UFC originally tried to book Dan Henderson vs. Antonio Rogerio Nogueira II for the main event, but Henderson turned the fight down, prompting the UFC to make the card significantly less hideous (sexually, not competition-wise) by giving Alexander Gustafsson the fight. One might think that Henderson would want to avenge his earlier loss against Nogueira, but he seems scared more interested in moving towards a title shot:

I was under the impression that [Dana White] was still kinda on the fence on whether he was gonna put me in front of Rashad [Evans] or not. That’s assuming Rashad wins. He did offer me a fight with little Nogueira and I just didn’t think the fans would be interested in that fight and it was a little bit, not as much time as I’d like to prepare for a five round fight so I told him I’d wait and see what happens with the Rashad fight,” Henderson explained. “I’d like to fight Jones now, rather than if I took that fight with Little Nog. I wouldn’t be fighting Jones for another eight, ninth months. I’m okay waiting a little bit. It was more about having the time to prepare and I did inquire to say hey, I would be interested in doing it if it was a three round fight, I could have time to prepare.

I always think of Henderson, and he thinks of himself, as a guy who takes on all comers and has a decent shot to win against anyone. But the whole blindsiding Matt Lindland with a lawsuit thing let us all see “ruthless businessman Dan”, and refusing the Nogueira fight to get closer to a title shot reinforces that image. I understand that at 41 years old, Dan wants to maximize the impact of whatever time he has left in MMA, but Sylvester Stallone has taught us that sucking on executed Chinese prisoners’ balls and calling it “replacement therapy” is a very powerful thing. Doing this could keep Henderson young and spry for decades, so he shouldn’t worry too much. Plus, anyone with that face certainly has little to lose in taking whatever fight comes along.