[youtube nwW30U7ntlc]

(Diaz walks in around 41:30.  Hendricks and GSP dominate the conference until then.)

Nick Diaz produced some more beautiful Nick Diaz madness at the UFC 158 post-fight press conference, showing up unannounced towards the end and going off about his strange world while Dana White watched on uncomfortably. Naturally, the most interesting bits had nothing to do with Georges.  Most notable was Nick’s tongue-in-cheek admission of having never paid taxes – a strange non-sequiter that will probably come back to destroy him, right?

I can’t be jumping teams, I just have to invest a little bit more, now that I have a little bit more money.  You know what, I’ve never paid taxes before, I’m probably going to go to jail … Nobody wants to hear about that talk or what’s really going on with me, but I might as well just be a kid.  You know, I’ve had fight after fight after fight after fight, you don’t know what that does to somebody that didn’t graduate high school.  You don’t understand.  Everybody has to take that – well, nobody has to do shit – but you can take it into consideration for a second and think about what three fights a year will do to you your whole life and then the only time you have some time off, it’s not like a vacation.  It’s this very depressing thing, everyone’s telling you you’re this piece of shit.

Tax evasion is some pretty serious business for anyone, much less fighters.  Mike Tyson made a career of owing millions to the IRS who more recently took $5.6 million in back taxes from Floyd Mayweather’s purse against Juan Manuel Marquez.  Dana certainly thought so, too.  He touched on Diaz’s tax situation at the media scrum:

To publicly admit on television that you’ve never paid taxes in your life, that’s something you don’t tell anybody and hope they never come fucking find you, but they will … He better handle that shit fucking tomorrow.  If there’s one organization that does not fuck around, it is the IRS.  Those are the last guys on earth you want – I’d rather have fucking ninjas after me than the IRS.  I would rather have the mob after me than the IRS.  They don’t play.”

Diaz’s main complaint fight-wise was with his camp – whatever a “camp” really is in the world of Nick Diaz – bailing on him during his year off after his fight with Condit while GSP was doing all sorts of cross-training with Lucian Bute and John Wayne Parr.

I had retired and Dana came up to me, I was at a show with my brother for the Henderson fight and he comes up to me and he goes, “so you ready for this shit?  You gonna do this shit?” … As soon as I had [UFC 158] coming, no one was around to help me.  The only one that came to help me was my sambo coach Gil Castillo, but you know, Jake and Gil [Melendez], they can’t train hard right now.  They have fights coming up, they have stuff going on and they need to have their downtime when there’s downtime.  I can’t go roughing those guys up just because I need training.”

More craziness including Diaz’s challenges to GSP and Anderson Silva and his defense of Pride rules after the jump.

Diaz has been coming forward more and more with his “woe is me” attitude, which this time he decided to break out in support of his claims to fights with GSP and Anderson Silva

I don’t ever get time off, I’ve only had a year off one time and it was a stressful year … I was just sitting there depressed the whole year off … the only reason I’m here right now is I want a rematch.  I think I can beat you [Georges], that’s what I think.  But, you know, I may be a better matchup for Anderson Silva as well, but you know, we’ll see what happens.

I didn’t have a good first round or a good performance tonight but I carried out a lot of my plan and what I wanted to do.  I just think that I could have been a little better prepared for this fight and I think that maybe next time, if I did get an extra shot, I think that people would try to help me out a little bit.”

He closed with the classic grappler’s contempt with the unified rules and judging criteria, interestingly enough in support of Carlos “one, two, five” Condit who was worked an active bottom game against Johny Hendricks but (justly) couldn’t edge the decision.

I hate that [Carlos] lost.  I hate it … I think that the way the sport is geared towards the wrestler going on top every round.  If you watch Pride FC … you gotta punch the guy, you gotta punch down.  You take the elbows out so if you want to make some good punches, it makes some good space too.  It makes it a lot easier for the guy on bottom when he’s not trying to dodge elbows and he can make some attacks and do some guard.  I know Joe Rogan would like to see some bottom game but I just don’t think it’s going to happen when guys are trying to just lay flat or sit up for the elbow.  I think there should be a lot more trying to advance position of they stand it up.  You used to watch the Pride show and they go, “action, action, action!”

I really worry about Nick Diaz sometimes.  He has an incredible amount of experience (and mileage) for a 29-year-old but he always acts resentful for whichever turn his career takes.  It’s a long way back from two losses his division but I believe he is the most interesting character in the history of the UFC and it would be a great shame if he does actually decide to retire and stay retired.