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“Hopped up on goofballs!”

Sports gossip site Terez Owens is the first blog to take a guess at what ‘health issues’ have taken Mike Goldberg out of the commenting booth:

The UFC refused to comment, but our sources are telling us the reason behind Goldberg’s no show is he’s stuck in Rehab for a pill addiction. Our source tells us Goldberg has an addiction to adderall.

Adderall is a kind of amphetamine – an extremely mild and pussy kind of amphetamine, but an amphetamine none the less. If this is true, the bad news is no one at rehab is gonna be giving Mike props for being a hardcore motherfucker. The good news is this shouldn’t be too difficult of a habit to kick, before it spirals into something worse. In Vegas, you start with taking a few extra dexies to help yourself with concentration or alertness and the next thing you know you’re hooping meth in an off-strip bingo hall while jangling someone’s ballsack. Hey, if it happened to me it can happen to you!