Clearly the body of a 93-year-old man.  (Pic props: MMAjunkie, obviously)

Of course the big question about Chael Sonnen’s “indefinite” suspension from the California State Athletic Commission was what exactly does that mean?  Forever and ever and also forever, or just a year or a few months or what?  It was thought by some that he might be able to reapply as early as June 29th when his California license expires, but good ol’ Ben Fowlkes got the CSAC to clear things up.  Sorta.

CSAC executive officer George Dodd told MMA Fighting on Thursday that the soonest Sonnen could reapply for a fighter’s license is May of 2012, though he could apply for a second’s license to corner other fighters sooner.

“One of our rules, in our Title IV [of the California Code of Regulations], stipulates that you have to wait one year after an appeal of your suspension or revocation of license. And since he appealed this [on May 18, 2011], it’s one year from the day of denial.”

Wait, it gets better:

If and when Sonnen does reapply for a license in the Golden State, Dodd said, he would have to show the commission proof of his rehabilitation, much like Josh Barnett was asked to do in his recent CSAC hearing.

“[Sonnen] is going to have to show that he’s done something to promote the sport, promote goodwill,” Dodd said. “He does a lot of good things already. He talks to kids and stuff like that about making right decisions. But he’s going to have to show that he’s making the right decisions as well. You can say it, but you have to make those decisions yourself.”

I’m not sure that making Sonnen talk to kids and do anti-drug PSA’s or some shit should be taken as rehab or promoting goodwill, considering he’s obviously a compulsive liar, so rattling off some pre-fabbed bullshit to kids would be like child’s play to him.  But I sure can’t say I feel sorry that they’re going to jerk him around and make him jump through a bunch of hoops.

What’s maddening to me is that the central issue of all this, his testosterone “therapy” and wee-balls medical excuse, has still not been directly addressed.  And it won’t be at least until he reapplies, at which time he can still ask for a medical exemption.

“What would happen is he would…request it through the athletic commission. The commission would probably request that the medical advisory committee review it. The medical advisory committee would review it and then make a recommendation back to the commission whether or not to approve or disapprove.”

So will they then finally take him to task for the fact that his excuse doesn’t jive with reality?  He’s crying that he needs TRT for his “survival”, he has the testosterone level of a “93 year old man”, and his mommy (who was in on the money laundering with him, remember) says he wouldn’t even be able to get out of bed in the morning without TRT.  And back at his first CSAC hearing, his doctor claimed that his testosterone levels are towards the low side of normal even with TRT.

But if that’s all true, then why did his piss sample show levels FOUR TIMES HIGHER than the allowable limit?  My understanding is that even if a fighter is granted a TRT exemption, his testosterone levels must still be below the commission’s maximum.  In other words, you can use TRT to get back into the normal range if you’re deficient, but you can’t boost yourself past that and effectively use it as a steroid.  So the obvious implication here is that even if Sonnen does legitimately need TRT, he was apparently using way more than he needed medically.

I’m no doctorologist, but I think the questions that need to be asked here are:  do a patient’s levels go above the commission’s limit immediately after an injection/treatment, and if so, how long before they drop below again, and when was Sonnen’s last injection before his piss test?  You see where I’m going with this.  We won’t know for sure if Sonnen’s excuse is valid until we have these answers, and despite all the talk about this case, it seems that no one, including (or perhaps especially) the athletic commissions, really knows how this stuff works in this regard.  It’s almost like TRT is some kind of witchcraft, the mysteries of which may never be unlocked… but they’ll go ahead and let fighters use it anyway.  Just make sure you fill out the paperwork properly, or else they’ll bust your ass good.

Bottom line, Chael Sonnen is now proper fucked until at least mid-2012.  With no fighter license, no realtor license, and no TUF coaching gig, I guess he’ll be reduced to teaching classes at Team Quest to make a buck for the next while.  Aww, poor criminal.