I’ve recently been watching old episodes of House and there’s nothing like a medical mystery show to make you paranoid about the wide variety of parasites, bacteria, and illnesses that can turn you into a seizure-ridden mess pissing blood out of every orifice. Read about MMA long enough and you can get similar heeby-jeebies – from BJJ herpes to snapped tibias, there’s lots of horrific medical mishaps to be afraid of. Such as unknowingly suffering a brain hemorrhage like (former) UFC 129 fighter Brian Foster:

Fiore believes Foster’s hemorrhage may have occurred during a hard sparring session two days before the MRI was taken.

“A blood vessel broke open, started bleeding, and turned into a brain hemorrhage,” Fiore said of the injury. “Our doctor and the UFC doctor said they won’t clear him to fight.

“It should heal on its own, and if it’s good, he’s cleared to fight. If not, then we have to obviously (look at surgical options).”

What’s scary to me is they didn’t even know his brain was bleeding until they did the MRI for UFC 129 two days later. If it had happened earlier, they might never have known. I’d always assumed brain hemorrhages were the kind of things that always manifested themselves via the sudden need to go to the emergency room. How often do MMA fighters unknowingly hemorrhage blood in their brain???

That’s not even the worst injury Foster has suffered recently:

The bad news comes on the heels of another serious injury from which Foster recently recovered. Fiore said the welterweight received a hard kick to the groin six weeks ago that caused one of his testicles to burst, and doctors were forced to remove it.

HE LOST A TESTICLE! A TESTICLE! Between the brain and ball thing, I think someone needs to take their training down a notch or something.