Dana White says he wakes up every day wondering what’s going to go wrong, but I bet he didn’t expect to get a call on Saturday informing him that his light heavyweight champ and squeaky clean posterboy was booked for DUI. Jon Jones crashed his vehicle into a pole at 5am in the morning this weekend and was bailed out by his mom a few hours later.

Jones walked (or at least staggered) away without injury. Not so lucky was his 2012 Bentley Continental GT – a car that costs a quarter of a million dollars. I guess when you’ve got a high performance piece of equipment like that, slamming the engine into a pole basically FUBARs the whole thing because it’s apparently a write off.

All this is extra surprising since up until now it was generally believed that Jones – like his best bud Jesus – was incapable of erring or making mistakes. Afterwards, many fans flocked to the internet to celebrate his outing as the two-faced fake they always suspected him to be. The richest / most ironic Jon Jones quote being thrown around: “I think they trust that I will never make them look bad. You never have to worry about me getting a DWI or doing something crazy. I think I’m a good company guy.”

When reached for comment, Rashad Evans said ‘I’m praying for him.’ Ha! Not really. But see how dickish that sounds when you turn it around? It’s holier than thou crap like that which has everyone so thoroughly amused by this whole situation. This is a guy who once distanced himself from Muhammad Ali comparisons because Ali was a ‘flawed’ person. Insert something here about motes, eyes, logs, yada yada yada.

After the jump, more media from the crash.

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Years from now people will make pilgrimages to Upstate New York to visit the pole Saint Bones martyred his Bentley upon.

Gordo, j’taime.