Apparently, James “Talk to yo’ masta; come holla at me, boy” Toney has been limiting himself to one Triple Whopper per day in anticipation of his fight with Ken Shamrock, which is targeted for November but has not been finalized. 8 Count News has posted a new picture of the formerly-pudgy former boxer actually looking decent at 213 pounds at a party in LA. We will now have to go from dubbing this fight a potential Deepwater Horizon or Exxon Valdez-type “disaster of epic proportions” to a mere train wreck. However, explosions, twisted metal, and general incompetence are still expected all around.

We all can’t help but remember when Toney showed up at a very fat-looking 237 pounds for his weigh-in against Randy Couture at UFC 118. The reason why we can’t help but remember it is because the image was irrevocably seared into our retinas and now we have to watch it over and over again while trying to enjoy porn. Attempting to alleviate the ocular havoc that was being wrought, Toney donned a t-shirt for the staredown, but the damage was done. And this was AFTER he had “slimmed down considerably” since the fight was announced.

Badlefthook has some information about Toney’s past history with weight issues:

For those who didn’t see Toney’s fight in February with Damon Reed, it’s available on YouTube. Toney, who turns 43 in August, looked awful in the 10-round decision win, and came in at a career-high 257 pounds. That’s 20 pounds higher than he was when he was heavily criticized for being in terrible condition in 2006 against Hasim Rahman.

It is good to see Toney in a condition that doesn’t simply scream “washed up”, but the circus atmosphere during the June 26 press conference just reeks of desperation. It is always fun to witness insults such as “When it’s over, I’m gonna blow you up,” but it ends up being a situation in which we curtail our levity because deep down inside we know it’s wrong to laugh at the handicapped. The 30-second grappling rule and three-minute rounds proposed for the bout not only make it clear that Toney is admitting inadequacy, but may also be part of the reason why the location of the bout has not been finalized: legit athletic commissions may be hesitant to approve the rule changes. Though if I were on an athletic commission, I’d be more concerned about the fact that both of these fighters have absorbed so much punishment that they may both be literally one punch away from subtitles.

This also invites speculation as to how much weight Toney could actually cut if he were serious about getting all the way into shape, and had time to do so. At 213, he could easily cut water weight to make 205, but based on the fact that he still appears to have a decent amount of body fat (black may conceal the torso, but in the golden days of MySpace, I learned to judge fatness by the arms and neck), he could probably eventually make Franklinweight (195), or perhaps even middleweight. He will still suck at grappling, but he might be able to actually dispatch some low-level opponents with punches at those weights, making the slobberknocker enthusiast in all of us say “ooooooooooh”.

One more video of Toney after the jump, going “Mruwhwmfhfhfm Kimbo mmrrrphtfffshfffffssss…”

[youtube C6Fm9udJdBs]