The fighter payouts for the final Strikeforce show have been released by the Oklahoma Athletic Commission, and some guys brought home the bacon and got sloppy knob jobs from their women, while others brought home the bacon bits and were forced to tug to internet porn – if they could even afford to pay the bill.

As always these figures represent contracted dollars and do not include bonuses, sponsorships, or separation pay.

Tarec Saffiedine: $39,000 ($19,500 win bonus)
def. Nate Marquardt: $40,000

Making less than the guy you just whooped is pretty sucky, but making your UFC entrance as the final Strikeforce champion with an impressive win over a quality opponent isn’t bad. Nate, on the other hand, lost his title, had his stock fall, and has a leg that looks like he owed the wrong people a shitload of money.

Daniel Cormier: $120,000 ($60,000 win bonus)
def. Dion Staring: $8,000

Just a couple of years ago Daniel Cormier was viewed as a chubby light-heavyweight who couldn’t hang with the elite big boys. Then he stepped in as an alternate and won the Strikeforce Heavyweight Grand Prix. Now he’s viewed as a chubby light-heavyweight who can whoop most top heavyweights, and just made more in one fight than 95% of the world does in a year. Not too shabby. Poor Dion will be subsisting on Ramen Noodles for the foreseeable future.

Josh Barnett: $250,000 (no win bonus)
def. Nandor Guelmino: $12,000

The night’s biggest winner, Barnett earned a cool quarter mil in about as easy a manner as humanly possible. As for Nandor, well at least he made more than Dion.

Gegard Mousasi: $175,000 (no win bonus)
def. Mike Kyle: $25,000

I’m surprised Mousasi has such a sweet contract. Not that he’s not a great fighter, he is. But he’s still not a big name in the mainstream. I’m sure he’s quite happy right now, but how happy is he going to be when the UFC offers him half that to join their roster?

Ronaldo Souza: $100,500 ($28,000 win bonus)
def. Ed Herman: $34,000

Jacare is the six figure beneficiary of an Ed Herman who showed up looking like he just got out of the hospital after having a dozen kidney stones removed. Not that Herman ever had a realistic chance of winning, but he can usually be counted on to at least make a fight out of it.

As for the undercard:

Ryan Couture was very lucky to get the decision here. But controversy aside, he fought with a hostility that screamed, “I wanna be a fuckin’ fighter!” That, along with the Couture name should get him a UFC contract. Now all he needs to do is take that 22k and get some electrolysis on the six long-ass, unsightly hairs around his nipples.

Tim Kennedy pulled in a handsome payday, now if he could only get more than one fight a year it may make leaving a life of roadside bombs and community showering for pathetically low pay well worth it.

At 2-8 in his last ten, and owning the shame of being such a bad stand-up fighter that people actually beg him to use his ground game more often, Jorge Gurgel should probably hang up the gloves. But more than likely, Jorge will erase the embarrassment of being on the un-televised portion of the final Strikeforce event with three other guys no one has ever heard of by entering next season’s Bellator tournament where apparently being a former UFC fighter is more than enough to get top billing and guarantee total victory.

Ryan Couture: $22,000 ($7,000 win bonus)
def. KJ Noons: $41,000

Tim Kennedy: $80,000 ($25,000 win bonus)
def. Trevor Smith: $8,000

Pat Healy: $42,000 ($15,000 win bonus)
def. Kurt Holobaugh: $9,000

Roger Gracie: $94,000 ($47,000 win bonus)
def. Anthony Smith: $10,000

Adriano Martins: $16,000 ($8,000 win bonus)
def. Jorge Gurgel: $10,000

Estevan Payan: $12,000 ($6,000 win bonus)
def. Michael Bravo: $6,000