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Unhappy Thanksgiving, you bastards

If you’re a big fat stupid American, then you’re probably busy being at home eating lots of good food with your fucking family. As I am a goddamn Canadian, I’m stuck at work in a tie eating a stupid Nature Valley bar for fucking lunch like a schmuck.

All those other sites may be off for Thanksgiving, but not us. We will continue to dance for your amusement like the lackeys we are.

As for what we’re thankful for:

  • We’re thankful that we haven’t gotten sued by the UFC yet
  • We’re thankful we haven’t been physically harmed by an MMA fighter for the things we’ve said about them
  • We’re thankful that our readers aren’t clueless morons or useless assholes like at

That’s about it. We’d also like to thank our sponsors … but we don’t have any. So I guess that’s that. Happy fucking Thanksgiving you sons of bitches. I hope you choke to death on your turkey.

  • kermit_01 says:

    Well not all of us Fat, Stupid Americans are lucky enough to have today off. One of the downfalls of my job is that we can’t close for Holidays.

    However I do get a free Turkey Dinner! So I’m pretty excited about that- anything free, even if it is Hospital Food.

  • Josh Man says:

    And I’m proud to be an American, fucking America! While I’m stuffing my face with delicious Thanksgiving fare I’ll watch some old episodes of Kenny vs. Spenny so I can see some funny Canadians.

  • I know those guys … they live down the street from my old roommate when he lived in Toronto.

  • Swedish guy says:

    Kenny vs Spenny and fightlinker must be the only two fun things to come out of Canada. Still I’m thankful for all three (or four, if canadian Thiago Jake is considered part of fightlinker nowadays)! Happy Thanksgiving — saturday is my birthday so there’ll be plenty of celebrating even with us swedes missing out on this particular festivity! Soon I’ll be thirteen, yay!

  • jazzn says:

    Fightlicker, your blog is like an IQ test; I know I must be a moron given that I keep reading it.

  • dulljake says:

    you bet your goddamn Swedish ass I’m part of fightlinker!

  • stellar53 says:

    Happy Thanksgiving bitches……store better be open tomorrow…

  • el feo says:

    dance, lackey, dance.

    -a medium built, reasonably intelligent, cheeky American bastard

  • Ted Dibiase says:


  • uh oh, I read sherdog and fightlinker, what the hell does that say about me?! ahhh!

  • stellar53 says:

    That means you are one sexy bitch with a fucked up psycho mind…..

  • ajadoniz says:

    What about Conan, he’s a canuck also, isn’t he? Also a good import. i have not seen Ken’ vs Spen’, looks kinda hacky, but again, i havn’t watched it. well, i’m going to spend my time downloading copyrighted material without paying for it. g’day and happy thanksgiving.

  • Wu Tang says:

    Hey at least you get free health care. We do not, so once we get all fat and bloated, we will be in need of something that is free. So dont bitch, you got taht healthy bar, you also got us readers to keep you company who supports your additive MMA habbits. fightlinker is my coke for MMA, i need it mroe and more and more. So stay healthy and dont bitch, let your bitch do it for you, or that guy who is serving you taht cake with nothing more than a tan and a tight ass g-string, or what ever they call it when guys wears it.


  • According to Grey’s Anatomy, Turkey day is really bad for people cutting shit off while carving the turkey and people overeating and needing their stomach pumped etc.

  • Mobb Deep says:

    Swedish Guy,

    Since your Swedish, I don’t expect you to know this but after oil and wheat our top export is comedians: Jim Carrey, Mike Myers, Martin Short, John Candy, Dan Aykroyd, Eugene Levy, Phil Hartman, Leslie Nielson and Tom Green, just to name a few.

    Is Jake and Ryan next?

  • dulljake says:

    depends how big MMA gets!

  • Swedish guy says:

    I don’t know mobb, out of the ones you mentioned I’d only consider Jim Carrey funny, because, you know, I’m neither twenty years older than I am nor an uneducated hick — hence I don’t like Saturday night live type of comedy.
    And, seeing you’re a fan of down town NY hip hop — what good music has Canada produced then? Of course this isn’t me saying Sweden has ever produced any 😉

  • Sweden doesn’t make music … sweden distributes music 😉

  • Mobb Deep says:

    Well, in terms of hip-hop, Canada sucks balls at that. But, Celine Dion would smash Ace of Base anyday.

  • operator says:

    Yeah were just not gangsta thats why we can’t rap. Shit our government won’t even allow fifty cent to perform in Vancouver without a big debate. Apparently we might start shooting each other like those crazy Americans if we see a rap concert. So how are we supose to be gansta when they won’t even allow fifty to cross the border. Shit I seen Godsmack in Victoria then I saw snoop and ice cube and they had armed police at the rap concert. There were less people at godsmack but it was more rowdy than the rap concert but they needed guns at the rap show. What a fuckin joke that was I don’t know what they were thinking maybe they were protecting us from the rappers.

  • kermit.01 says:

    Police with guns? Oh my god.. In America we just call that normal..

  • Swedish Guy says:

    Yeah Mobb, you’re right, but still, in Canada Ace of Base is played like every single hour… I rest my case! You buckin me, I’m buckin right back at you!
    Btw, ever heard of swedish hip hop crew Looptroop? They’re the bomb. Check out modern day city symphony. Awesome record. They’re huge Mobb deep fans as well, sampling and paraphrasing them all the time, so perhaps you’ll like it.
    And as for the not allowing rap stars to perform, Sweden allows it – we just arrest them afterwards for possession so they never come back. Sweden has like the world’s harshest sentences for drug related crimes.

  • operator says:

    A guy gets beaten to death at a korn concert but the cops show up for the rap concert that is my point dip shit.

  • marshal says:

    Meshuggah is from Sweden. I like Scandinavian death metal.

  • nem0 says:

    Fuck Thanksgiving in its stupid turkey-loving ass. (This message brought to you by nem0’s violent allergy to turkey and all things turkey related.) I spent my day off running around in the woods taking photos of dead animals after my cousins shot them in my aunt’s back yard, because Montana is hardcore like that.

    And big ups to the Swedish pop scene. Ace of Base 4eva, bitches.

  • kentyman says:

    Shit our government won’t even allow fifty cent to perform in Vancouver without a big debate.

    I’m surprised ajadoniz didn’t immediately demand a currency joke. “Don’t you mean 0.498499 CAD?”