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UFC offends yet another group; midgets join culinary union

Sure, we all like to make ourselves feel better by comparing ourselves to midgets, and we all have a good laugh every now and then because they can’t drive cars before strapping on those cute little stilt thingies. And we especially love the ability to avoid that annoying “pedophile” label every now and then. But let’s make one thing perfectly clear: midget jokes are not to be made lightly. When you make fun of midgets, you disrespect and offend an entire class of people who have no advantages in life except when it comes to horse jockeying, fitting into small spaces, and penis-to-body-size ratio.

So it comes as a surprise that Dana White, with all of his newfound sensitivity about rape and gayness, would viciously crush the self-esteem of 20,000-175,000 people worldwide. He actually had the nerve to tweet that Matt Serra is only 30 inches tall and weighs 325 lbs. So not only is he calling Matt Serra a midget, he’s saying that Serra has a severe case of this terrible disability. Serra may be a little fat nowadays, but he’s clearly at least three feet tall. Get your facts straight, Dana.

Now the Little People of America organization is bound to join with the Culinary Union in protesting the UFC, and the LPA is not to be messed with. We all saw the uproar caused when Oompa Loompas were duplicated via photoshop in the new Charlie and the Chocolate Factory movie, preventing many aspiring midget actors from getting work. It should now be a matter of minutes before a throng of level 80 dwarven shadow priests from World of Warcraft show up at UFC headquarters carrying torches and curse the shit out of the rest of our beloved MMA cards from now until eternity. Good going, Dana, you midget-hating asshole.

Serra’s response after the jump