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UFC 82: Pride of an Underdog

I’d just like to take a moment to announce that I’ve got a new girlfriend, and her name is BetUS. We’ve been fooling around for a while, feeling eachother out and seeing how we fit. At this point I’m happy to make things official: she’s my girl and I’m her guy. She likes the fact that I’m a know-it-all prick and I like the fact that she takes my abuse and gives me nice fat paychecks.

To celebrate our union, I wrote a nice little article on which underdogs actually have a chance of winning at UFC82. As with everything I write, I’d take it with a huge grain of salt – keep in mind that even the dubiously legit MMA Girl has a better track record than I do with picks. But you’re a big boy and can think for yourself. Use my totally awesome information to help you make your picks:

Josh Koscheck (-500) vs. Dustin Hazelett (+350)

We joked that Dustin Hazelett would need to spend some time off in the woods firing guns and doing other manly things after the sportsbooks castrated him with such terrible odds. I’m still not really sure why we’re all bowing down to the altar of Koscheck. 2007 saw Josh perform terribly against a sick and weakened Diego Sanchez, and then get outwrestled by Georges St Pierre.

Anyways, here’s where most sites would tell you not to gamble unless it’s with money you can afford to lose. Oh, and not to gamble if you live in the US because it might be illegal or some shit. But my opinion is this: You might as well try to make some money with your rent money before giving it to your landlord, right? Right??? And how about you stop being a sheep of the government and do what you know in your heart is right. Gambling is as American as apple pie and waterboarding. If it’s wrong, then I don’t wanna be right.

We get paid every time someone signs up and gives credit to Fightlinker. That money would then go to things like toilet paper and ramen noodles, which is a definite step up from the cat food I’ve been eating for the past few weeks. So if you wanna help us out while possibly helping yourself out (or DESCENDING INTO THE HELLISH WORLD OF GAMBLING ADDICTION), go sign up.

  • kentyman says:

    Ryan Harkness is the head editor of the mixed martial arts community site and host of the top rated MMA podcast The Low Blow.

    Now that’s comedy gold! 😉

  • Yeah we’re like “Arrested Development” … all 10 people who watched it loved it

  • JackalAss says:

    I’ll never bet money on a fight again.

    I lost 200 dollars on the silva vs chuck fight.

  • Beau says:

    How is BetUS about getting your money when you wanna cash out? Bodog makes it nearly impossible. You need to fax them several forms of id and then they only ship the check via FedX and you need to sign for the package and if you’re not at home you have to drive to the FedX office within a few days or they send you check back. Basically a huge fucking pain in the ass. If BetUS has a better system for cashing out then I will definitely sign up.

  • Gaston says:

    Sweet article. I´ve allready placed all my bets some time ago but interesting analyzis. Is this somethnig we´ll be seeing regualary? Sure hope so

  • dulljake says:

    all part of the new Fightlinker strategy: make some fucking money!

  • Yeah, general plan is to add more content specifically tailored to betting on events. As per usual, the changes are all about a new kind of content, not really a change to the existing content.

  • Swedish guy says:

    Man. Signed up yesterday to betus, after hearing you on their radio show. Somehow I kind of liked that host.
    Didn’t know at the time I could give you guys credit for the signing up though, sorry!

  • Yeah Damon is a good guy, HUGE part of why we decided to work with BetUS over anyone else.

  • Lifer says:

    or SHILL

    it came out german when i typed it for some reason.

  • kentyman says:

    If Damon is such a good guy, he should credit you for Swedish guy’s sign up too. :)

  • hehe *makes fluttery eyelashes at Damon* maaaybe he will!

  • kentyman says:

    Who’s the shill now?!

    Oh, me? Balls.

  • Swedish guy says:

    Hope you got some good money for that.

  • Atom says:

    I haven’t heard of one place to bet online yet that is good about paying out conveniently…

    FL- any words of encouragement? betus any better?

  • Swedish guy says:

    Unfortunately (for betus) unibet carries the odds of this ufc show, so this time I’ll go with those guys.

    I just put in some $40 dollars in total, not a lot but there are, just as you pointed out Ryan, some interesting underdog odds. I played five different bets, some 8 dollars on each:
    1. Herring defeats Kongo
    2. Hazelett defeats Kosheck
    3. Bielkheden defeats Sanchez (pretty nice odds… six times the money so why the hell not)
    4. Tanner defeats Okami
    and the triple combination:
    5. Herring wins, Bielkheden wins AND Gurgel wins. This combination, if it by some miracle would happen to go through, gives me some $200 back for a $8 bet. So it’s worth a try, right?

  • GonzoDamon says:

    Joined, referred by

    I really hope that this goes better than the last two sites that I tried. If not, I’m driving all the way to Canadia to shat in your decent beer.

    It’s my mofo birthday today! One of the sites, I think it was BoDog, gave me a little extra betting credit on my birthday. Is BetUS that cool?

  • DamonD says:

    “So it’s worth a try, right?” – Swedish Guy
    Swedish, thats exactly why you never meet a bookie with a part time job.

  • Jackie Chiles says:

    “Given Yushin Okami’s track record, Evan Tanner will have 15 minutes to knock out or submit the boring Asian.”
    This line made me spit my fairy cake out. Haha.
    Dude, chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature…

  • GonzoDamon says:

    Hey, Ryan, on that “article” you wrote for BetUS, it said RECEIVE $50 AND JOIN NOW! with HALF OF THE REST OF THE FUCKING IMAGE ABSENT!!! What a rip-off!! I joined and I did not get this $50! I’m sure that the specifics are in the other half of the image that won’t load, but I tried opening it in FIrefox, IE7, and both by right-clicking and selecting ‘view image’.

    What’s the deal here?

  • Wu Tang says:

    I LOVE Arrested Development!!! Chicken Dance!!!
    As for BetUS.. I lost 3k with them a few years back, so yea no, wont go back. Plus im a yankee, if i gamble outside of an Indian burial, i would be in prison shitting with no seat on a hard cold steal toilet.

  • DamonD says:

    Hey Spazmo Damon, this is the other Damon, the picture said “recieve a $50 free play with a $100 deposit”. If you didn’t get it, lemme know and I’ll make sure you will.

  • GonzoDamon says:

    Damon, how can I contact you?

  • DamonD says:

    If you’re all hooked up on, you can send me a flim message, that goes for anybody with questions about MMA betting, BetUS, not going to jail and dealing with online sportsbooks, just hit me up here and i’ll sort you out.

  • godzillad says:

    I’m calling shenanigans on the cat food, Ramen noodles cost less than a stick gum.

  • kentyman says:

    DamonD, can you define “free play” for us?

  • DamonD says:

    sure dude, a “freeplay” is a fancy word for play money. You can win that play money into real money if you’re good enough, but there are usually restrictions to turning it into real dough, (thus the willingness to hand them out like they was now n’ laters and shit) but they’re a fun way to start off in wagering, and how we hope to hook you on for eternity.

  • dulljake says:

    Gonzodamon, you a feb 28 baby? cuz one of your fightlinker boys is also…as in me bitch!!!!

  • if u ever watch Alias, damond is like our vaughn, our cia handler who takes care of shit. he da man. fuck i ma drunk. jakes bday. lots of beer drunk shim an