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Say, are you a heavyweight with issues fighting in America?

Well, have I got the promotion for you!

Strikeforce has landed prized free agent Fedor Emelianenko, his stable mate Gegard Mousasi, former WWE star Bobby Lashley, NFL and Olympic veteran Herschel Walker, and most recently former Pride champion and UFC star Dan Henderson, among others.

Now promotion officials are in talks with two more high profile fighters in Roger Huerta and Josh Barnett.

That’s right – Barnetto, creator and sole proprietor (with an assist from a designer steroid primarily designed to combat bitch tits) of the piss that sunk Affliction, still pending his oft-delayed appeal to the CSAC, is now on Coker’s radar.  Perhaps he could fight Overeem on a barge.   Winner gets Fedor – with no elbows on the ground, of course.

I’ll forgive a one time steroids infraction if you come back, win and test clean from then on.  Barnett is a habitual, repeat offender that tested hot before and after the two biggest fights of his career and actually dodged his first positive test by the grace of the commission.  It’s early in 2010, but this is in the running for Least Impressive Sentence of the Year:

Barnett is currently on a four-fight winning streak, defeating Hidehiko Yoshida, Pedro Rizzo, Jeff Monson, and Gilbert Yvel.

Oh, man.  Fuck the guy that beat Heath Herring, Randy Couture and Frank Mir in succession.  Fuck the guy that just starched Yvel.  THAT’S the guy I want to see fight Fedor next.  With no elbows on the ground, of course.  And then, if we’re lucky, we’ll see MMA become more like boxing, with their success putting on The Most Obvious Fight in the History of Mankind.

Huerta is a borderline genius signing if they can close the ‘chasm’ regarding compensation currently characterizing the negotiations – despite his two straight losses, he puts on a show every time, and any combination of him, Melendez and Thomson is a winner.  Barnett, on the other hand, should be beaten like a dog with mange at every opportunity, and that does NOT involve giving him ANOTHER crack at Fedor.  First Diaz gets rewarded for straight skipping a piss test for a title shot, now Strikeforce is going after a guy that said ‘fuck it, might as well piss and see if I get lucky’.  Fuck that, man.