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Sam Sheridan on why MMA isn’t gay

Everyone understands why MMA is both the most and least gay sport in the world all at the same time. You’ve got guys in their skivvies rolling around on the ground together all sweaty like, grunting and groaning as they try to force their opponent into submission. Sure, they’re not doing it for any sexual purpose, but on the gay guy boner meter, it still pops higher than anything else you’re gonna find on TV that isn’t flat out ass blasting. The Daily Beast wrote an article on MMA’s popularity amongst homos, and cleverly titled it “Is MMA Gay?” This week Sam Sheridan (who is not the guy in the above picture, I was just looking for a gayish MMA picture to go with the post) completely misses the point and tries to explain why it’s not:

Having fought and trained a little, let me assure you that there is nothing sexual going on—fighters are in survival mode, the “fight-or-flight” instinct is in full swing. It’s kill or be killed, intensely claustrophobic, and a mental and physical war of counter and bait, deception, and speed. A fighter’s grappling style reflects his body type, his temperament, his training and his thoughts, just like an artist’s. There are thousands of variations on attacks and defense, “the ground game” is hard to appreciate at first, but worth the study. Is it homoerotic? Sure, if you want it to be. But, as Freud said, sometimes a cigar is just a good smoke.

And sometimes a cigar is a presidential sex toy. It’s all in the eye of the beholder, really. Trust me people: you can’t stop gay people from sexualizing MMA any more than you can stop your girlfriend from masturbating to Georges St Pierre in the bathroom with her brush handle. Grappling is no more sexual when women are going at it, but that doesn’t stop us from regularly fantasizing about getting involved with our 25 centimeter poles. What makes you think it’s any different for people who find guys hot?