When I was in the Marines I worked in an F-18 squadron. Every now and again one plane would be so dicked up, and so many parts raped from it, it would become the latest ‘hangar queen’ – which is the industry term for a plane that’s been grounded for a while, gutted for parts, sitting in a hangar for months on end, and generally would require a psychotic pilot to take it out for a spin once it was finally put back together again. Every squadron has one of these pilots. They’re well respected for their gigantic nuts, but viewed as somewhat unstable for actually volunteering to fly a plane that a week ago was a skeleton, then deemed air-worthy after the parts finally came in for a bunch of hung over 19 year olds to reassemble.
Quinton “Rampage” Jackson is the UFC’s psychotic pilot. Originally scheduled to be Glover Teixeira’s opponent at UFC 153, Rampage was forced to withdraw due to injury. Fabio Maldonado stepped up and took a beating that would have brought about criminal charges in most countries. After seeing the level of danger Teixeira represents, you’d think Rampage would count his blessings and move on. But I suppose that’s what makes me a keyboard warrior and not a fighter. Nope, Rampage still wants to fight Teixeira. He sent a Tweet to UFC boss Dana White:
“Yo @danawhite set up that fight with Glover please! Lets give him what he wants..fans I won’t let u down fightofthenight”
You got to admire the sack Rampage is showing here. With his incessant whining, it’s real easy to bust Page’s balls. But it’s also easy to forget that Rampage is a fighter who has never shied away from fighting the best guys. He has one fight left on his UFC contract, then it’s cheetos, handjobs, and million dollar paydays in the boxing world, or so Rampage thinks. Ending his UFC tenure with a devastating loss would not lend much weight to his boxing prospects, yet still he wants to fight a top guy. He could just as easily request a beatable opponent and go out with some leverage. But I guess that’s just not Rampage. The dude is a fighter.