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Pudgy White Dude vs. Chubby Black Dude in Strikeforce

Puzzled by that headline? Strikeforce heavyweight contender Brett Rogers is officially set to fight some guy named Fedor Emelianenko at a future event, the date of which is yet to be determined. From Showtime Sports:

At Fedor’s public workout in New York City, Scott Coker announces Fedor’s plans to fight Brett Rogers. Event details to come.

Don’t turn around because there’s a giant pink elephant in the room standing right behind you. There’s no other way to say it than to just say it: this has spoiler written all over it. Sure, Fedor is clearly better in every area of fighting. (Well, except for “keeping it real” or “representing” or whatever it is the black minority ethnic cool kids are saying these days.) Fedor is quite possibly the greatest mixed martial artist in the history of this sport (although proponents of Anderson Silva and GSP might argue with that) and Brett Rogers is a prospect who beat up a bunch of no-name fighters before KOing Andrei “Glassjaw” Arlovski before the fight ever really got started.

Rogers will be a heavy underdog against the top ranked heavyweight in the world, but a Fedor victory is far from a guarantee as this sport is highly unpredictable. It seems every time a fight is booked with a specific winner in mind, shit goes horribly wrong. The examples are numerous: CroCop-Gonzaga, Serra-GSP, Kimbo-PinkHairedGuy, Shamrock-Berry, Liddell-Jardine, Me-TwelveYearOldDownTheStreet, Forrest-Jardine.

Fedor is nearly inhuman, but he’s still human. Eventually someone is going to beat him and Brett Rogers has the type of heavy hands that could knock anyone out on a given night. Can “The Grim” land his bread-and-butter punch on Fedor? I don’t know, but on fight night my beer-and-wing sauce covered face is going to be glued to the TV.