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Okay, so my Mexican is non-existent, get off my back. I wouldn’t even have to reveal such terrible shortcomings if the world of MMA wasn’t getting weirder and weirder every day. That’s I guess a bonus of more people getting into this sport … as the fans get more diverse, the kind of shit fans do to pay tribute will get further out there. And the further out there it gets, the more entertaining my blog becomes.

For example, check out this dude’s rousing acoustic rendition of the Pride victory song. Now here’s a song to bang a chick to if I’ve ever heard one. It’ll be nigh impossible to feel like a loser with this going on in the background. And the best part is she’ll think you’re just being romantic, when in truth you’re just THE BIGGEST LAME FANBOY ON EARTH.

Jesus. The last time I heard anyone seriously talk about pit fighting, it was 1992 and it was in reference to that shitty Atari game. Okay, so it was only shitty because it rendered me an arcade junkie who’d root through his mom’s purse for stray quarters. Anything to get my fix.

But now Bob Meyrowitz (who could possibly still think it’s the 90’s himself) has teamed up with Live Nation and is bringing back the term for his new MMA promotion: YAMMA Pit Fighting. He’s also trying to bring back tournaments, ‘legend superfights’, and something regarding a new kind of fighting surface that promises to ‘revolutionize’ the sport.

Of course, what do you expect from a guy who brought us ‘the cage’ and almost added a moat full of alligators and barbed wire to MMA?

According to Josh Burkman’s myspace page, not only did he feel like he won the fight but that it was Mike Swick’s fault that it was boring. Take a look at his latest myspace bulletin:

First I wanna thank you guys for your support, I got alot of great messages and tons of support. Thank you!
I’m not gonna look back on the fight and be upset about the decision because there is nothing that I can do about it. I could have done more and I Will learn from it.

Thoughts on the fight… I was ready for a war and so was Swick. I saw it in his eyes at the press conference, weigh-ins and the stare-down I thought it would be a war!.. But when the fight started Swick realized he was not the better fighter… he was in there with a better fighter than he prepared for. Half way through the first round that look he had was gone and he wanted out!… He wasn’t in there to fight after the first round, i took it from him and we both know it… He’s still trying to figure out what happened, but sometimes you forget things when you’re scared!…

After the first he knew I was there to fight and He wanted no part of it!… When I would get ahold of him he would just hold on cause he felt safe there… I probably should have backed of the takedowns and clinch but I felt i was in control of the fight and that it was obvious. 2 criteria’s for judging are aggressiveness and octogon control… When did you start getting as point for good defense!… I stood in the center most of the second round just to prove a point… Maybe it would have been better recieved if i would have called him on, but that’s not my style… I felt if he didn’t want to fight I could atleast throw some kicks and some other crazy stuff to show I was there to fight or maybe it would get him to engage… I guess I was wrong.
I apologize for a boring fight, I learned alot from it and I will be back better and smarter as a fighter.
“People’s Warrior”

Here’s the deal: the fight sucked because Josh Burkman is one dimensional and the only iota of success he had against Swick was when pushing him up against the cage working for a takedown. While you can blame Swick for all the boring times when they were circling eachother, Burkman gets just as much blame for all that cage-hugging shit. Burkman called it ‘aggressiveness and octogon control’. I call it terrible boring bullshit. This isn’t the Ultimate Hugging Championships, no matter how much JBURK and Timmy Sylvia might wish it was.

You know, I will meet him halfway though: I think he deserved the judge’s decision, just barely though. But considering he was given a gift decision against Forrest Petz, I’ll let this one slide. Karma’s a bitch, JBURK.

It’s new hotness vs old and busted: the UFC is putting their new Brazilian acquisition Rousimar Palhares against Ivan Salaverry in May. You may remember Ivan Salaverry as the guy who doesn’t seem to give a shit about fighting in the UFC. You also may remember Ivan Salaverry as the guy who got trounced by Terry Martin in 2 minutes the last time he fought.

Honestly, I have no idea why this guy is even getting thrown a booking. There’s about several thousand more deserving guys out there who are young and hungry who would strangle their mothers to death with fishing wire for a chance to fight in the dark matches. But instead we’ve got cranky old Ivan stepping up once again. Blows my mind.

Minus a title fight, UFC Fight Night is now looking better than most PPV events! The show has been shaping up more and more as time went on, until now it includes 8 killer bouts between solid competition. I have to hand it to the UFC, they’re definately making it worth my while to sit through endless Castrol and Rambo commercials. Check out the card thus far:

      * Kenny Florian vs. Joe Lauzon
* Stephan Bonnar vs. Matt Hamill
* Thiago Alves vs. Karo Parisyan
* Houston Alexander vs. James Irvin
* Marcus Aurelio vs. Spencer Fisher
* Josh Neer vs. Din Thomas
* Clay Guida vs. Samy Schiavo
* Anthony Johnson vs. Tommy Speer

As an added bonus, the event will mark the first time that an Ultimate Fight Night has ditched the standard “shitty venue full of morons attached to a casino” and moved their show somewhere bigger, better, stronger: Colorado. Yeah, it’s still nowhere near the east coast and us fans who live in the North East area of North America are still generally getting the shaft, but it’s a step in the right direction. The more new places the UFC visits, the better. And I’ll be eternally gratefull if I never have to see another event from a Hard Rock venue with a capacity of around 1000.

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