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(Evan Tanner with Arianny and Rachelle at some clothing convention. They’re stayin’ classy, San Diego)

Yeah, we’re back and we changed the name! I can’t believe I’ve been slacking for like 5 days, that’s fucking nuts. Never again, my fair jackals. Never again. So lets get rolling and see what the fuck’s up in the world of MMA!

Wanderlei Silva considers moving down
I’ve been trying to figure out a way to say this without being all “nyeah nyeah I fucking told you so” but I can’t. So nyeah nyeah. I fucking told you so.

Jeremy Stephens vs Terry Etim @ UFC84
It’s always nice to see young kids doing well – the UFC did Jeremy Stephens a real disservice in the beginning by throwing him in the deep end with a life preserver made of lead. For his UFC debut he was put up against Din Thomas, who started fighting when Jeremy was 11. I’m also pretty sure the UFC didn’t expect him to beat Cole Miller, but Jeremy did good and kicked his ass. Now he’s fighting Terry Etim, so we’ll see if this kid is for real.

Lindland off to DREAM?
Denis Kang says Matt Lindland is going to sign with DREAM. I’d like to imagine Dana White gives a shit, but I know he doesn’t.

Paul Buentello wants to be relevant again
Seems like every heavyweight has-been wants a piece of Kimbo. Some are trying the “I’ve got no respect for you, we should fight” route (Ricco) while Paul is trying the “I like you, we should bang it’ll be fun LOL” angle. Of course, EliteXC is going for the “Easiest opponent with biggest bang for buck” fighter. So no way Kimbo will fight either of them

Tito Ortiz is making another shitty reality show
I don’t know if Tito really plans on making a reality show or he’s just fucking around trying to piss Dana White off by using as many UFC trademarked words as possible in his press release.

Above: Phil Baroni lowlight, including 4 minutes of Phil flexing and preening + a minute at the end of him getting his ass whupped by various people. Looks like it was made by the guys at Team Quest … how nice of them!

Wanderlei Silva vs Quinton Jackson: Have you ever said to yourself “I wanna relive the glory of Wand vs Rampage 1, but with a terrible hip hop soundtrack? Then this video is for you. Or you could watch it on mute and just enjoy the smackdown.

Never Back Down Featurette 2: How do you try and trick MMA fans into thinking your movie isn’t going to be a complete mockery of the sport? Have Bas Rutten come in to ooh and aah over the technique being shown.

Red Belt Trailer: Looks like they asked Randy Couture “What’s mma all about” and he said “40% sleazy promoters, 50% lawsuits, 10% fighting”.

Dana Fucking White: A nice little collection of Dana White swearing his ass off.

Tito Ortiz on MadTV: I love this skit. Ping Pong is my favorite MadTV guy ever!

UFC 4 Legal Groin Shots: Oh Keith Hackney. The world would be full of little Joe Sons right now if it wasn’t for you.

Videos after the jump!

wanderlei silva vs quinton jackson

Never Back Down Featurette 2 : Bas Rutten

Red Belt Trailer

Dana Fucking White

Tito Ortiz on MadTV

UFC 4 Legal Groin Shots!

Since everyone else is getting all hardcore on Google Trends, I thought I would throw my hat into the ring and do some serious analysis. As you can see, figures like Randy Couture and Fedor fare well when placed together. While Brock Lesnar scores higher, it’s not all that significant until the UFC 81 event.

However, adding VAGINA into the equation really shows you something. What, I’m not really sure. There’s no numbers to the side of this. It’s just fucking different colored lines. Google Trends is stupid. Time to go do a real google search on vagina. It’s a lot more satisfying.

The thing that annoys me most about this whole Kimbo thing is that for the next bajillion years I’m going to have to hear retards and morons argue over whether he’s “The Real Deal” or not. His fight with Bo Cantrell certainly didn’t prove anything. And while we learned a little bit more from his fight with Tank (he did defend a takedown of questionable quality, and showed he’s got pretty accurate striking), I’ve still got more questions about Kimbo than Kimbo’s got people in his entourage.

But my main question is more to the MMA community than to Kimbo: Do we really need to be having this stupid debate on Kimbo’s abilities? This isn’t a situation like Fedor where arguments regarding his talent decide who holds MMA’s #1 pound for pound position. Everyone admits he’s still untested, and no one really knows how far he’ll go. It just seems to be this kneejerk reaction from people … they can’t resist blabbing about how Kimbo sucks whenever someone talks about how wicked he is. Luke Thomas still likes to label that racism. Me, I think it’s just general waddage from people who don’t want Kimbo’s street fighting past to blur the line between felony fight and mixed martial arts.

Whatever the reason, can’t we all just sit back and enjoy Kimbo’s fights until the day (long in the future, I bet) that Gary Shaw decides to put him up against someone legitimate who’s under 40 and not going to take a dive? Then maybe we can have a debate over his talent and future as a force in the heavyweight division. But until then we’re all just wasting our time.

The Diaz brothers blow me away sometimes … they’re so full of themselves it’s crazy. I’m all for a bit of smacktalk and some animosity, but if you asked them what they thought of the T-1000 in Terminator 2, they’d be all like “That fucker is a pussy. I’d whup his ass like the bitch he is!”

Of course, this smack would be a lot more believable if Nick Diaz hadn’t been sucking it up since Nevada took the W out from his crown jewel asskicking of Takanori Gomi. Since then he sucked it up in a terrible fight against unknown Mike Aina and then got absolutely PUNKED by KJ Noons (who he should have slayed). Of course now Diaz is once again saying “That KJ fucker is a pussy. I’d whup his ass!”, and is accusing Noons of ducking a rematch.

While I’m all for Nick Diaz getting a rematch sooner or later, it really should be later rather than sooner. Word is they’ve shipped Nick out to Hawaii so he can get his smoke on without fear of suspension + fight another sacrificial lamb. I hear they used to throw these people into a volcano back in the day. Now they just stick them in a ring with Nick Diaz. Of course, the way Nick has been fighting lately, I’d choose him over Mount Kilauea any day of the week.

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