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Out of Touch with Reality: WAMMA Edition

WAMMA. “>The name sounds like a shitty toy you could buy in the back corner of a dollar store. Seriously, go check it out. I’m sure there’s something similar.

The organization itself started up in order to somehow facilitate different promotions coming together to co-promote shows. That hasn’t really worked since the UFC doesn’t play well with others and promotions like EliteXC and Strikeforce had no problem coming together on their own. Or was it to create an objective rankings system with recognized champions, regardless of organization? The vast majority of top fighters in the world reside under the Zuffa banner so it’s been pretty tough to get that one done, too. Or was it to help jump start a potential fighters union? Nay. Nothing much on that front either. Will somebody tell me what the goddamn point of this thing has been?

Look, no matter what the original goals of WAMMA were, the lack of cooperation from Zuffa has thwarted any plans they may have had. If you’re “>a coal miner and you show up to the mine with your hard hat and pick-axe and everybody there tells you that there’s no coal in the mine, you don’t start picking away. It wouldn’t make sense. What I’m getting at is somebody should’ve dumped the whole concept the minute Zuffa refused WAMMA’s proposal to go to the 8th grade dance together.

Despite this, COO of WAMMA Michael Lynch made some pretty interesting statements while announcing that the upcoming Shinya Aoki v. Eddie Alvarez fight would be for a WAMMA title. The whole concept is noble — having an undisputed champion regardless of promotion — but without consent from Zuffa, it’s much like the naked pictures of myself I send to Megan Fox: it’s just not going to work no matter how hard you keep telling yourself otherwise.

Remember the WAMMA title isn’t just another title – a WAMMA championship represents the very best in the sport.

Aoki and Alvarez are two of the best out there, no doubt. But BJ Penn is universally regarded as the number one lightweight fighter in the world. What’s that? He’s not in the fight? Well then, you’re shit out of luck, boys.

The current EliteXC champion Robbie Lawler would be a great fight for Silva. However, there is no mechanism in place for an intermediary to come in and sanction an inter-promotional matchup. That is where WAMMA comes in – helping facilitate having the best fighting the best. Could promotions come to terms without a third party involved? Possibly, but having a credible, fan and fighter-forward organization like WAMMA serve as the facilitator between two organizations helps better create the possibility of cross-promotional match-ups.

Where do I start? Yeah, Lawler vs. Silva. Sweet fight. No mechanism in place for an intermediary blah blah whosit whatsit? Zuffa doesn’t work with anyone else. You know this. You know why. Cut the shit. You sound like one of those Rhodes scholars who claim Elvis is still alive and living in a suburb of South Dakota: silly, delusional, and irrelevant.

It is our plan to award Fedor his WAMMA Championship Ring during the [Affliction 2] pre-fight festivities (note: pool party at the Atencio residence). The ring is awesome, made and designed by Tiffany’s, and looks as great as any Super Bowl ring.

That Fedor. How he loves wearing rings. And MMA fans sure do love a good Tiffany’s product. You know your demographic like John Travolta knows a good woman: he doesn’t.

Mr. Lynch, if I’m coming off a little bit harsh here it’s because you’re not giving me much to work with. The day WAMMA does something for this sport that actually helps it progress forward I will jump on the bandwagon. The day WAMMA accomplishes something that aides the fighters in some substantial sense I will voice my approval. That day is not today.

What’s that? All I do is couple MMA news with toilet humor and dick jokes? You are correct, sir. At least I’m self-aware and not living a lie.