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Lance Evans flakes out again

You might remember Rashad Evans’ brother Lance from this season of TUF8 where he quit the show after one round of fighting. Now he’s pulled out of his fight at tonight’s TKO event against hockey enforcer Steve Bosse:

Aside from Hominick, Justin Tavernini and TUF 8 alum Lance Evans were forced to pull out of the card in recent days, Tavernini due to an injury from a sparring session and Evans for undisclosed reasons.

Evans was scheduled to meet local favorite and former hockey enforcer Steve “The Boss” Bosse.

Bosse, who is 3-1 in his mixed martial arts career, had his opponent changed twice in the span of two days. Evans’ replacement versus Bosse was Miletich Fighting Systems product Sherman Pendergarst, according to TKO’s official web-site.

Upon arrival at today’s weigh-ins, Bosse’s opponent had changed yet again. Bosse will now take on formidable TKO veteran Sebastien Gauthier, who beat Icho Larenas in his last fight.

Now I don’t want to trash people before I know the full story … the full story is usually a lot more juicy than anything I can make up anyways. Actually, maybe not. Let’s try this out:

The TRUE reason Lance Evans cancelled his TKO fight is because Rashad was teaching him the tweaky twist nipple dance and Lance blew his titties out. As you all know, the nipple is like the belt buckle of the upper body, and if it breaks all your muscles slide down into your groin to create what is known in fitness circles as ‘spam crotch’. So as of now Lance Evans is off tonight’s TKO card with a bad case of spam crotch.