twitter google

Jon Koppenhaver won’t go to jail

It’s official: Jon Koppenhaver has gotten out of an assault charge without jailtime, instead getting 3 years probation and 30 hours community service. Jon had been involved in an altercation where a bunch of his boys beat the shit out of some guy. Lucky for him, he ‘only held the guy’ and didn’t ‘wail on him’. Also lucky for him is that the victim was a cool ass cat who basically asked the judge to give Koppenhaver a break:

Zatkow publicly stated during the trial that he didn’t want to see Koppenhaver’s career ruined by the charges. He asked for restitution in the form of $2,300, which Koppenhaver has already reportedly paid.

Judge Frank Brown said that Koppenhaver’s situation was not that he would normally feel compassionate about, but also noted that he wanted to give him a second chance.

“No good comes of calling you a felon,” Brown said. “However this also means that I want you to stay out of trouble and lead a good life. You should be thankful towards Mr. Zatkow, he was very compassionate of you.”

Having had a bunch of knuckledragger high school friends end up in juvi for watching a friend beat someone up, I can attest to the fact that Jon was fucking lucky the victim spoke out for him and asked for leniency. Otherwise there’s a pretty good chance Koppenhaver would have ended up in a pound me in the ass prison.

  • dignan says:

    He would’ve been giving everyone his “O” face.

  • Higgz says:

    Nice “Office Space” reference.

    “Hey Peterman! The boob commercial’s on again!”

  • Captain says:

    Hopefully he keeps going to therapy and gets his emotions under control. His fight with Rollins was one of my favorite fights of last year. Especially the way it ended. Partly cause I like War Machine and partly cause Rollins sounds like Mike Tyson and is never funny but somehow had the audicity to talk about the way other people speak and think he was funny doing it. Fuckin douche.

  • Nick says:

    The winning team. Best fucking attorneys in town! Cole Casey and Mathew Terry.

    Today in my sentencing hearing I successfully got my felony reduced to a misdemeanor. I received Summary Probation instead of formal probation which was exactly what we were shooting for. No jail, none of that nonsense.

    Thanks to all of you that stood by me through my court case. I am glad that it is all behind me now and am ready to start preparing for my next fight in the UFC May 24th!

    Thanks again.

  • Xavier says:

    That victim is a retard. The dude fucking held you and you forgive him? Retard.

  • fightfan says:

    POST 4

    Agreed. That dude must be a fucking total loser. Maybe he got a sweet cash “gift” from War Machine and company.

    That would be the only way I would let someone embarrass and beat the piss out of me, then let him off and ask the judge to be easy on him