(ABOVE) Bill Goldberg – The best announcer in the universe: Whoever ‘hiostaja’ is, my hat is off to him. Well, it would be if I wore a hat. Unfortunately I have a strange skin condition that causes my scalp to flake if there’s fabric against it. So I’m not really able to wear a hat. BUT if I COULD, I would take it off. For this is one of the best videos I’ve ever seen ripping apart a commentator in the history of the internet.
UFC Knockouts: The ying to Pride’s yang, there really aren’t enough UFC knockout highlight videos out there. Probably because the UFC’s lawyers are ASSHOLES.
Aleksander Emelianenko vs Ricardo Morais: Lil Fedor was just toying with this guy till he steps in and puts his fucking lights out.
The “MMA Girls” have competition: Well, not really. Plus: Smaller pants. Same dippy accent. Minus: Worst music in the world, makes my penis invert into my body. TERRIBLE TECHNIQUE. While I’m still 50/50 on if the MMA Girls are a sham, I’m 10000% sure these girls have nothing to do with BJJ other than for a paycheck.
Gigantor women wrestling: Speaking of things that make my penis invert into my body, here’s some female body builders wrasslin’. And speaking of things that make clitorises grow into little penises: Steroids.
Little Dog MMA: If you liked bugfights, then you’ll love annoying little dog fights. Oh wait, no you won’t. Like me, you’ll just watch this till the end to see if the dogs end up savaging the baby a foot away from the action. I’ll leave you in suspense.
Diego Sanchez vs Karo Parisyan: It’s only round three, but it’s still a great round from a fight that was my pick for Fight of the Year backin 2006. Let’s hope David Bielkheden is lying about not bothering to watch film on Sanchez. Not only is it smart to understand your opponent, but the dude’s got some pretty damned good fights.
‘THE’ UFC Highlight: If you’ve ever been to a live UFC, you’ve seen this video played on the big screen between fights to pump the crowd up.
Wing Chun for everyday situations: Yeah, everyday if everyday you’re attacked by bat wielding men who ALSO use wing chun. Watch this, and then tell me what your thoughts are on wing chun as a martial art.
Nogueira Highlight: Great Big Nog highlight set to classical music showing him subbing everyone out and whuppin their asses.
Griffin vs Bonnar 1: The classic slugfest that was voted ‘The most important moment in UFC history’ by the UFC.
All the videos embedded after the jump!
Aleksander Emelianenko vs Ricardo Morais
The “MMA Girls” have competition
Gigantor women wrestling
Little Dog MMA
Diego Sanchez vs Karo Parisyan
‘THE’ UFC Highlight
Wing Chun for everyday situations
Griffin vs Bonnar 1