Thank God that the UFC hasn’t held being stupid against Hermes Franca. Because he is one dumb motherfucker. First he uses steroids to try and help rehab an injury so he doesn’t have to pull out of his title fight. Let’s break down why that was stupid:
- He didn’t use a steroid that would clear his system in time for his fight
- He did this before fighting in California, where everyone gets tested
- Even if the fight hadn’t been in Cali, title fighters are ALWAYS tested
So as far as doing steroids go, he did them in the dumbest possible way – albeit for the least sinister reasons. And with that in mind he came forward the day he got caught and admitted he used steroids, and that he was sorry. Which again is a fucking stupid thing to do. Look at all the other guys out there who LIED and got their sentences reduced to six months.
Last but not least, Franca then asked to be released from his UFC contract so he could fight overseas during his suspension. The problem? You’re kinda sorta not fucking allowed to do that! I’m still amazed that your average Cheetos-stained blogger knows this, but a guy who makes a living off of fighting doesn’t. Dumb, dumb, dumb, dumb, super double fuck dumb.
But all these mistakes were at least honest and sincere ones, which is why I’m happy that the UFC has agreed to pull Franca’s contract out of the trash bin so he can fight again for the promotion. He’ll be showing up at UFC 87 to take on wrestling powerhouse Frankie Edgar, who was last seen getting pulverized by Gray Maynard. While Frankie’s got more gas than a Texaco, I’ll be giving Hermes the edge since he’s got more ways to finish the fight.
**CORRECTION** We initially listed Franca’s opponent as Gray Maynard when in fact he’s going to be fighting Frankie Edgar. In the future when I try to call people stupid, I will attempt not to make stupid mistakes in the same breath.