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Haters gonna hate

Sometimes it feels like Jonathan Snowden is to Bloody Elbow as Oscar the Grouch is to Sesame Street. While he agreed the Lesnar / Carwin fight was teh sweetness, that didn’t stop him from essentially calling both fighters crappy losers:

We learned a few things about Brock Lesnar tonight. We confirmed what many suspected: Brock Lesnar doesn’t like to get hit. As soon as Carwin touched him, Lesnar did more than cover up. He flat cowered against the cage. He wasn’t hurt as much as terrified. Make no mistake-Carwin had that fight won. Against anyone who isn’t the promotion’s heavyweight champion, that fight gets stopped due to some brutal ground and pound.

Lucky for Lesnar, Carwin isn’t merely a one-round fighter. He doesn’t event have that much in him. Three minutes into the bout and Carwin’s heaving breaths couldn’t feed his mammoth muscles. Lesnar survived, less because of his own defensive prowess and more because Carwin gassed and gassed bad.

We learned a few things about Shane Carwin, too. When the fight went to the second round, Carwin was no longer participating. He looked like he was approaching a heart attack and was like a spectator at his own execution. Lesnar took him to the mat with a sloppy tackle and shortly thereafter finished him with an arm triangle. It was hardly a display of technical prowess. Carwin had either checked out mentally or simply couldn’t summon the energy to defend himself.

It’s hard to say Carwin didn’t blow his load like ” target=”_blank”>the dude in Scary Movie 1 considering the fact that they had to take him to the hospital post-fight due to hyperventilation. But still, that there is some serious glass half empty shit. Like glass smashed and Jon’s gonna slit his wrists with the shards because there was nothing redeeming at all in their performance.

Let’s try to be a bit more balanced: Brock ate some brutal shots from Shane Carwin and didn’t go down. He covered up and ran away, but jeez … this is MMA, not pro wrestling. He can’t just take those like a chair shot to the face and then come back Hulk Hogan style. Was he lucky that Rosenthal didn’t stop the fight in the first? Only when you look at refereeing through the lens of standard ref incompetence. And that arm triangle was about as slick as you can expect from a fight involving two 265 pound neanderthals.

I think a lot of the shit talking you’re going to hear from people coming out of this fight originates from the whole “Who’s the #1 heavyweight” argument that’s gained new life since Fedor pulled an Akiyama and let himself get subbed out. Personally, I refuse to get into that debate since RANKINGS ARE STUPID AND SO ARE PEOPLE WHO OBSESS OVER THEM. Brock Lesnar is the UFC’s heavyweight champ, Shane Carwin was the #1 contender. They fought, it was hella entertaining, and if you’re not a big sourpuss you can probably leave it at that.