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dj, why are you calling

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dj, why are you calling everyone a bitch?

Not everyone, just you and Frick.  Frick and I have a very … complicated relationship that we’ll explain to you when you’re older.  But since you’re so young and tender, you veer into bitchitory from time-to-time.  If I didn’t call you on it, where would you learn shame?  A little thanks is in order.

you’re hurting my feelings, right where my dad used to touch me.

You now that’s not our fault.  I told you we wouldn’t have to touch you there if you didn’t look so good.  When you’re older and look more like your mother, we’ll stop.