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Evan Tanner making headlines again

So what if it’s The Log, ‘SoCal’s #1 Boating and Fishing Newspaper’? Evan Tanner gets some press and we get to see a picture of his boat sunk in the harbor. Everyone else on the internet is all “Oh, poor Evan, blah blah blah”. Hey, I’ll give him some sympathy when it comes to his personal demons but his retarded boating misadventures are totally fair game. And it could be worse … a few months back we here at Fightlinker were expecting Evan to go down with the ship and never be heard from again.

What surprises me the most about this article is how well researched it is. Not only did these guys figure out who’s boat this was, the reporter followed up and read through Evan Tanner’s mad ramblings to get the skinny on why the fuck he left it in the bay. It was also nice of him to leave out a lot of the more salacious details of the whole affair. In short, I nominate this unknown writer to replace Kevin Iole at Yahoo Sports.

  • Amy says:

    See I knew you’d love that tid bit….Looks like Friday night Brahmas it is.

  • Xavier says:

    In true Tanner fashion, looks like something got a-grounded and pounded.

    Oh yes, that is the lame joke of the day. Oh yes.

  • Jemaleddin says:

    Gosh, I hope this doesn’t drive him to drink.

  • Jake says:

    Amy, are you trying to get Ryan and I to start drinking or something? This can only lead to boat sinking tragedy…

  • Amy says:

    If it will promote more Pirate and Count Bisping parodies from either one of you..then umm… fuck yeah. And you and I both know, neither one of you could make it off a dock, let alone sink a vessel. I say this with only love and adoration. Now I am going to go home and get hammered. Please be on the look out for offensive comments and random slurs later this evening.

    On another note…why the fuck is UFCMANIA sensoring all my comments now? For instance, thunder cunt……. what’s so bad about that?

  • Tommy says:

    Today was the day huh? Bet he was real sober when he did that.

  • garth says:

    one time, my dad took me out fishing on his 18′ center console. little did i know, as he backed it in and i was tasked with parking it while he stashed his truck, that the fuel lines were knackered fully. so as soon as he cut me loose and took off, the boat died. so i’m in barely any water, with the prop down, drifting around helplessly. there’s also about 50 guys waiting to launch as well. So i look at the dude backing in and go “The motor’s dead” with the “what can i do?” shrug. the guy looks at me for a second and walks into the water, then shoves my dad’s boat over toward the dock.
    Nice idea, i think, and jump in too. unfortunately it’s a bit deeper now that he’s shoved me, and i neglect to remove my wallet or anything else from my pockets, and went in almost to my chin. i did succeed in getting the boat to the dock and not drowning or being eaten by a seal or something even more stupid. all this stone cold sober, too.
    boats are hard.

  • Tommy: He sunk the boat a while back … we were all just too busy feeling bad for him at the time to bust his balls about it. But I doubt very much Evan wants or needs our pity, so we’re going to help him the only way we can: by continuing to poke at him in good natured fashion until he’s back in possession of the belt!

  • marshal says:

    I warned him about anal Jack Daniels shots!

  • Tommy says:

    Only the man in the mirror can change you life Fightlinker. “If it’s to be it’s up to me”. BADD Believe Attitude Desire Disapline

  • RabbleRouser01 says:

    Turns out, the boat didn’t sink because he fucked up…. He sank because it was old and started popping apart out at sea. It wasn’t the first time he had sailed it, just the farthest. It was also probably lucky he was close enough to land to ground it when the tide started going out (he didn’t ground it, as he claimed… just beating himself up about it)…. It allowed him to achieve his number one goal of removing all the potential contaminants off the thing, such as diesel fuel, chemicals, etc… How the hell do I know? Because the water was fucking cold while trying to swim all that shit onto the beach. And he didn’t “abandon” it, but when people who have the equipment to do the job want $11,000 upfront to do anything about it on a Sunday morning, its kind of hard to do that…. Top that with the issue that all your cash has gone into the damn thing that just sank, leaving one broke…. He offered to make payments, they refused. He was working on raising the money, interracting with the Coast Guard about it, and suddenly the boat was just gone one day. Fuck, I’d drink too…. But all that aside, the sail down was fun up to that point… Jealous bastards…. :)