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An open letter to Clay Guida

What happened to you, Clay? You used to be awesome man. Your fights were cooler than James Dean multiplied by The Fonz multiplied by smoking. Ever since you got back on TV after the Huerta loss it seems like you don’t want to be the Tazmanian Devil anymore. That’d be all fine and dandy for other guys; I mean, self-preservation has to kick in sometime, but you can’t do that if your game isn’t up to par in the other areas of MMA. At least when everything was good you had the trifecta of wrestling, cardio and agression, now you’re content with two out of three. You MAY be able to get something done like that but it isn’t likely. That’s like having a car with no wheels but a full tank of gas. And the car is a Toyota Tercel. And it’s upside down.

But the fans aren’t content with that. We see that you’ve changed your game up, and we don’t like it. When you did no damage to Mac Danzig we gave you a free pass. Us fans figured you were just making sure you got a win on TV to balance out the Huerta loss. Danzig had won TUF and had a big fight at UFC 83 before he ran into you. Mac isn’t known for his barnburners anyway, we were OK with your conservative strategy.

Then you fought Nate Diaz at UFC 94. And you hugged him. And then you told us you were bringing him into your “world of pain”. Now, unless you meant you were holding on to Nate because a “Guida’s World of Pain” portal was gonna suck you in ” target=”_blank”>like Evil Dead 2, there’s no excuse. You were always on defense when you weren’t on his back “like a ladder”. Diaz lit you up like a Christmas / Holiday tree standing and tossed you around like he was Gene LeBell.

We’ve seen you have an awesome match with someone equal to Diaz in Din Thomas. You broke his face in the standup and grounded and pounded all day despite the robbery of a decision. What happened? Why was January 2007 Guida better than January 2009 Guida at fighting a lanky grappler? I scored the fight with Nate 29-28 for you despite my borderline obnoxious fandom of the Diaz brothers, but the inactivity thing is getting old hat.

It’s time to change. No more holding back. Roger Huerta thought he was being attacked by a lion when he was loopy from your punches, while Nate Diaz thought he was wearing a human backpack. On top of that you think it’ll work against wrecking balls like Sean Sherk. We don’t wanna stop being your fans Clay, you’re one of our favorite fighters, but if we don’t start seeing some action again we’re gonna use your fights as bathroom breaks. They won’t be regular bathroom breaks either; we can safely bust out some Q-Tips and actually wash our hands too because we’ll know we have a full fifteen minutes. You have a rabid fan base that wants to do everything possible to cheer you, but you’re making it hard right now.

Clay: Please be the wildman again.