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Alan Belcher gets the worst sounding injuries

There’s a lot in the phonetic make-up of a word. The way something sounds has an effect on its perception. For example, I imagine it would be pretty cool to get arrested for mayhem, or battery, or better yet, inciting a riot, something that sounds badass. Conversely, I would never want to get pinched for luring, or stalking, both of which sound low-brow and carry a creepy connotation.

Alan Belcher knows a little something about the sound of words and how that directs perception. First and foremost though, Alan Belcher is NOT injured, so don’t go getting the wrong idea. He is fine and dandy and still set to face Yushin Okami at UFC 155. But a few months back while training for the ill-fated UFC 151, Belcher suffered a fractured spine. A Goddamn fractured spine! How the hell do you recover from that? It sounds too terrible, like something irreparable.

Back in 2012 Belcher had a detached retina. A fucking detached retina for God’s sake! I only have one thing to say to that: yuck.

What’s next for Belcher, a torn scrotum? A cracked knee cap? An infected anus? Whatever it is, the 28 year old is confident that nothing can stop him. Belcher spoke with and talked about his horrible sounding injuries and his upcoming fight with Okami:

“Nothing will slow me down. I came back from the eye problem. A lot of people thought my career was over, but I made the choice to start fighting again. I came back from that – I can come back from anything.”

“I’m getting better and better. Even with a broken back I’ve been able to keep my momentum going. I don’t think (Okami) can match me now. I feel I’m one of the best in the world.”

At UFC 155 Belcher will be looking to avenge a 2006 loss in his UFC debut against Okami. Here’s to hoping that in the meantime Alan doesn’t rupture his spleen, or puncture his eardrum, and can actually make it to the fight.